Cru the Dwarf: Drunken Duck is a Cesspit

Cru the Dwarf is a pretty bloody bad webcomic. It’s yet another World of Warcraft comic using machinima style posing using whatever useless bollocks they can drag out of the World of Warcraft files.

This is just about the worst piece of shit the entire retarded World of Warcraft subculture has ever vommited forth.
Can’t even make proper speech bubbles.

Cru the Dwarf probably started out as a joke, a rather bland and boring joke, with the rather large defeciency of not being funny at all. Unfortunately for the rest of the human race, it didn’t stay that way, it became the mad attempt of a deranged “author” forcing a fanfiction into a visual medium.

So it went from jokes about Night Elves being fanservice, into some twisted mess of timetravel and dragon’s getting impregnated by perverted dwarves. Let me restate that line in bold with swearing: FUCKING DRAGON GETTING FUCKED BY A UTTERLY IMMATURE PERVERTED DIMWITTED DWARF, but it’s okay, she was in her elven form.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Look, a Star Wars reference, aren't I delightfully meta?
A FUCKING DRAGON!

Yup. Couldn’t you just have stuck with pointless pop-culture Cru, hey, I didn’t even notice. IT’S A FUCKING SELF-INSERTION FANTASY TOO, oh the humanity. Why didn’t you just stick to your poor jokes Cru? Why?


Oh yeah, they sucked too.

It even steals an entire character from a much better drawn, but equally stupid, webcomic Looking for Group, and then Sean F, which is actually the name he now uses, tries to meta his way out of it, by constantly pointing it out. Well done Sean, got tired of people pointing out how odd your dwarf-dragon furry fetish really is?


I have no words.

But still have plenty of words about Drunken Duck, the Cesspit of Cesspit of the greater Webcomic world, and I use “world” because using the actualy words that comes through my mind “Zi dingir n Da Shurrim ma kanpa” is Sumerian straight from the Necronomicon, used to drive away fucking evil.

Here’s a fine example of the avarage Drunken Duck comic, except this one isn’t done in some 3D software, but is actually drawn, poorly. Etheral Legacies is some fucking incomphrensible fantasy webcomic that makes about as much sense as Lord of the Rings on backwards Kazakh.

It’s basically just a load of fanservice, I’m even vaguely insulted when it throws out a “Valkyrie” without even remotely realizing that an actual valkyrie would wear full armour and a giant bloody battleaxe, not have her tits hanging out and wear nothing but underwear, also, they can FUCKING FLY!

It’s plot makes no sense, and it’s all tits.

NEW AGE FUCKING VAMPIRES!

Charby the Vampirate is one hell of an odd one. I can’t actually force myself to read this one, because all I see is a little anime styled kid with a mouthful of fangs.

And I hate it. It’s apparently one of the top ten “best” webcomics on Drunken duck, which makes no sense, until you realize it’s actually just one of the top ten most popular webcomic, and then it all makes sense. It’s a cultural facts that there exist a sizeable subculture that rejoices in vampires and anime and all that shit.

can be more generic, if it had a panty shot.
Talking about anime.

Drunken Duck also has a lot of anime.

poorly drawn doesnt stop it from being on the top ten

And alot of poorly drawn crap.

And do they ever have a lot of pornographic webcomic.

But rejoice:

It’s not all crap. This is the chapter page from the latest chapter of Anathema, which is quite well drawn, has fairly interesting characters, one is a seemingly easy-going vampire, another is yet another cleric who uses evil to fight evil, and has a fair bit of collateral damage.

It’s decent, and has a fair bit of appeal, if nothing else, because the main character has enough flaws to make her anti-Mary Sue.

Will be interesting to see her eksentialist dread carry on.

A last honorable mention to The Gods of ArrKelaan, the grand old man of Drunken Duck, who deserves much more, and yet still remains.

weee

My closing statement is simply this:

Cru the Dwarf is the fourth worst webcomic I have ever paid any sort of notice to, it symbolizes pointless storylines, poor jokes, festishism and fan service.

It also symbolizes everything that’s wrong with a lack of quality control, thus Drunken Duck, and partly Comic Genesis, but that’s for later.

MegaTokyo: The Neverending Story

MegaTokyo is a webcomics that have been running since the late Mesozoic era, originally written by a deranged Dinosaur, it was picked up by Fred Gallagher of the secret Lizardmen cabal, who’s been adding to it ever since.

Having decided that it was time to move his horrible conspiracy forward, Fred decided to draw his awful cliché story back in the glorious year two-thousand. Originally, it was a useless comedy webcomic with gaming and Japanese cartoons.

Orginally drawn in a lazy anime way:

It oddly enough still is, wait, did I type oddly?By Jove! I forgot. Anime fans have NO FUCKING TASTE!

Megatokyo’s entire concept is a clueless, witless, useless, ugly, tasteless and utterly devoid of any human emotion nerd, who travels to Japan for no logical reason, and then goes on with his useless little life.

And despite being so utterly unlikeable, a generic Japanese woman, who doesn’t even vaguely look asian, “fall in love” or perhaps “fall in awkward affection that’ll probably never result in anything”.

And oddly enough, the humourous sidekick has more luck in his love-life, hocking up with some cynical women, and he at least is vaguely relatable, that is, if you’ve been bullied by anyone at anytime.

He’s basically a dick, but he’s a human dick, the main character, Piro, is a vague useless arsewipe, who’s is loved by a pretty girl, or girls, for ONE SINGLE FUCKING REASON!

He is the author, inserted into his own private anime dream world.

It’s a boring pointless story about a boring pointless charachter, occasionally giving paused by the comic relief fighting giant monsters in freaking Tokyo.

Whoopee, what a fucking surpirse.

Don't you miss Tintin? Where high quality backgrounds where a fucking STANDARD!

Megatokyo is the fifth worst webcomic I have ever laid my poor eyes on.

It represent bland anime styles, poor storylines and a neverending story, without the awesome song.

I’d recommend Megatokyo as worthwhile reading, the day the missing continent Kerguelen rises from the depths and unleashes the horrors that has rested there for untold years.